Christian Dating, Letting Go, Love, Self esteem, Self love, Unconditional Love

When You Love Someone, Let Them Go Free

When I say “let them go free” I don’t mean completely but mentally and spiritually. It’s so easy to become codependent by holding on tight in a relationship – and it’s usually because of fear of losing or being disappointed by that person. So we hold on tight, not knowing that we’re slowly taking away that persons freedom to live, we’re domesticating them based on our needs. Love doesn’t demand its own way and this applies to any relationship.

The realest thing I heard was someone say “You don’t own people, you experience them.” This is facts! People come in and out of your life but while they’re there, cherish and appreciate who they are and not who you expect them to be for you. This is the antidote to not carrying around guilt when that one person that leaves that you weren’t ready for them to go.

I never understood how my mom never returned to me recovered from drugs, you know in them movies where the mom would be an addict but before the movie ends, she’s clean and ready to take on the role as mom. That wasn’t my story – and I carried that around for years and it impacted my relationships with those that I loved the most. I expected them to be perfect, without flaw because my greatest fear was losing them to the temptations of the world. I felt that I worked sooooo hard not to follow in her footsteps that everyone else around me should have the same will-power. Selfish me. It took midlife for me to figure out that my way of thinking was all wrong. For years God has been dealing with me on how to love perfectly – and I finally know what it means to let go of my expectations of others – and to love and accept them as is. It wasn’t easy because I cried a lot and had to face my fears, but it was worth it because my relationships have a new meaning. His love.

If you have an issue with letting go, ask God for help because with fear comes torment, rather you’re tormenting yourself or others, it’s not the way to live. He came so that we may have life and in abundance. It’s time to set the captive free.

Until next time Sweetie!

His love and peace!

Mecca Lasha ❤️❤️

John 10:10

The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it abundantly.

1 John 4:18

There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with torment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love.

1 Corinthians 13: 4-8

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no account of wrongs. Love takes no pleasure in evil, but rejoices in the truth. 7It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.

Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be restrained; where there is knowledge, it will be dismissed.

Dating, Marriage, Self esteem, Self love, self-care., Single Christian Women, Single women, vaginal care

Who Run The World? VAGINAS!!

Kitty, vajajay, whoo-ha, poom poom, coochie, beaver, taco, honey-pot, P word, or thang (my grams name for it). Whatever you may call it, she needs extra love, quality time & attention. You can’t just slap any product down there and hope it sticks. God created it to clean itself internally (stop douching) but what about the external care? It needs more than aerosol spray, soap & powder. It needs daily hydration for those who love tight pants & thongs (prevents friction) and my every other day shave queens 🙋🏾‍♀️. Yep, that’ll be me. Chile…waxing hurts and I can’t risk the possibility of losing sensation in important places with the laser treatments, I’m just saying.

Do you have a daily regimen to prevent and treat razor bumps, burns and hyperpigmentation (discoloration), which is also known as excessive melanin production? Ladies, it’s not safe practice to shave over those conditions without allowing time for your skin to heal and regenerate new skin cells because doing so can cause bacteria to grow and the area becomes inflamed or infected. You don’t want that.

That’s why I created Mink Kitty Coat a company that provides organic vaginal products for the external (mon pubis) area. We have an Organic Vaginal Balm for women like us who shave and genuinely care about what we subject our kitty to. It has natural ingredients to resolve inflammation, discoloration and bacteria. Oh and maintain that sweat causing odor. You never have to wonder about any adverse reaction, unless you’re not following the directions or are allergic to the listed ingredients, in which you can pronounce and identify without googles help.

– Mecca Lasha ❤️❤️

Humility, Self esteem, Self love, self-care.

Sit Down Be Humble (Jesus, Not Kendrick Lamar)

Here I am walking to my corporate lunch room with my Cup of Noodles, Cheez-Its’ and water, while the aroma of everyone’s food consumed the area, it smelled like some good ole meatloaf and mashed potatoes. I’m thinking “Girl, why didn’t you grab that leftover spaghetti.” Not because I would prefer that over my noodles, but because I start feeling a little embarrassed. Just as I was about to get up from the table, I heard “Sit down and be humble.” (No, it wasn’t Kendrick Lamar) I literally laughed out loud! Who am I to be embarrassed about having food!!!!

I sat my proud self down, added my water to the cup and enjoyed my lunch.

How many things have you not done in fear of what others would think? More than likely, that person that you’re so worried about impressing really doesn’t care anything about what you do. And if they did, you’re not the one with the issue, they are.

I’ve made so many decisions based on what I thought people would think of me, and if my false image would be exposed. I never wanted people to view me as being less fortunate or naive. I faked it a lot of my life because my background was poor and I didn’t have the ideal childhood. I lied about so much that I started believing myself and before I knew it, I was a total counterfeit. My self perception was horrible.

Ladies, I was soooooooo miserable. Wearing a mask is a lot of work. It wasn’t until I met My Lord, My Savior, My Friend and the great I Am in my life that I learned to appreciate the person that He created me to be and not what the world thought I should be. I was finally free! And my life became all about pleasing Him but as you can see, that ugly pride sneaks up every now and then, and I get a great reminder, “Sit down and be humble.”

– Mecca Lasha ❤️❤️

Dating, Divorce, Love, Marriage, Past Hurt, Relationship, Save my marriage, Self esteem, Single Christian Men, Single Christian Women, Single women

Girl, Take That Ring Off!

Yes, that ring is gorgeous but it could be very ugly in disguise! I’m sorry ladies but I have to say this based on my experience, when he put that ring on my finger I changed immediately! From beauty to beast. He stopped being my knight in shining armor and became my highest expectation. Of course we had a great honeymoon period, all smiles, hugs, kisses, compliments and a lot of mushy stuff! However, it was over quickly because the expectations begin to take precedent when I start focusing on what I wanted and thought he should change. I became this person that I stopped recognizing, although I never disrespect my husband, my demands were high and insecurities were in full effect.

You see, this is my 2nd marriage and I can admit that back then I had no clue on how to be a wife and what was expected of me. Not to mention, God was nowhere in that marriage. I prayed for me and not for us. I changed my last name and I felt that was more than enough!  I didn’t like sharing my money or thoughts. I felt extremely defensive and guarded. I refused to be vulnerable because I knew he would consider that as a weakness and walk all over me. So I developed a “I don’t give a care” attitude. To make a verrrry long story short, we were not as one but apparently separate people residing together. We operated as roommates and not as husband and wife.

I told myself that my next marriage would be based on biblical principles and wisdom. No more worldly stuff. I remained single for 4 years, and during this time I read books, attended seminars, and meditated daily on everything “self help.” I became a walking reference guide. Haha!

All this wisdom was great but somehow I got amnesia because the material went straight out of the window when I said “I do.” I started walking in fear and not faith. I was so afraid of not being the perfect wife and making past mistakes. I start overthinking errrrrrthang! Lol. He would say yes and I would articulate that as “I’m only saying yes because I’m not courageous enough to say no.” Hot mess right? But before we were married, his word was never questioned. I trusted what he said and took it at face value. No questions what-so-ever! Girl, I was dissecting his words and actions! It was becoming really miserable for us both. Until one day my awesome husband told me “If we keep going this route baby, we’re not going to make it.” That truth crushed me but also set me free.

I finally put God in His rightful place and asked him what the heck was my problem. Now, at this point I needed help and fast. He told me that “He doesn’t owe you anything but you owe him My love and grace.” From that day forward my mission was to stop looking at my needs and focused on his and what God expected from me. There were challenges because the flesh is weak but the spirit is willing. I had to realize that before I put that ring on, I was focused on loving him, as is. I had no unrealistic expectations because I simply adored everything about him. Marriage convoluted my love and enhanced my fear of failing.

So when I say take the ring off ladies, I’m coming from a place of doing a heart check. Have you become so concerned with your own needs, that you forgot about him? If he chose you to be his wife, it was because you loved him (good, bad & ugly). Don’t stop now!! If he has changed a little, it’s probably because you have but no worries, he will be won by your good behavior. Trust me, but if you don’t, just ask my husband :-). We good over here. 😁

– Mecca Lasha ❤️❤️