Self love

If you don’t find yourself in Him, you’ll lose yourself to him

PICK UP YOUR CROWN, QUEEN

It’s so easy to get caught up in meaningless relationships with men who aren’t looking for more than getting their needs fulfilled while leaving you feeling empty. You go above and beyond to show him that you’re that “ride or die” chick. But does he notice or even appreciate your loyalty? You say to yourself and maybe to him when he doesn’t come through when he promises “I’m the best woman you’ll ever have.” But does he hear you? Sweetie, you can say all the words in the dictionary – that’s not going to change his feelings or actions towards you. Words without action only shows him that he can continue to misbehave without any consequences or accountability.

If you haven’t allowed God to show you who you are in Him, it’ll be difficult to show or tell a man how you deserve to be treated. The virtuous woman respected and honored her husband and his heart fully trusted in her. Guess why? In order to respect a man, you first have to respect yourself. This means having standards and boundaries. Her life wasn’t all about him, it was about Him. Her goal was to do what was pleasing to God. When you live a purpose driving life to please God, it would be difficult for anybody to come in and change the trajectory of who you are. When you want to say yes to an obvious no, it would be a an internal battle because your first thought would be does this please Him or him. Sweetie, I’m not just talking about sexually but also mentally. A man couldn’t run any type of game on you because your intuition (spirit) would be aware that it would keep you alert of nonsense or manipulation. Your confidence of who you are wouldn’t allow you to settle for anyone that doesn’t see your worth or treat you with respect.

Sweetie, only Jesus was perfect, so this isn’t about perfection but being so grounded in Him that a man can’t help but to adore and honor the virtue in you – and if he doesn’t, that’s not the man for you. Bless him with the gift of “when you go, don’t forget to leave.” In my Phylicia Rashad voice! 🤣

Proverbs 31:29-31

29 “Many women do noble things,
but you surpass them all.”
30 Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting;
but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.
31 Honor her for all that her hands have done,
and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.

Love & blessings,

Mecca Lasha ❤️❤️

Christian Dating, Letting Go, Love, Self esteem, Self love, Unconditional Love

When You Love Someone, Let Them Go Free

When I say “let them go free” I don’t mean completely but mentally and spiritually. It’s so easy to become codependent by holding on tight in a relationship – and it’s usually because of fear of losing or being disappointed by that person. So we hold on tight, not knowing that we’re slowly taking away that persons freedom to live, we’re domesticating them based on our needs. Love doesn’t demand its own way and this applies to any relationship.

The realest thing I heard was someone say “You don’t own people, you experience them.” This is facts! People come in and out of your life but while they’re there, cherish and appreciate who they are and not who you expect them to be for you. This is the antidote to not carrying around guilt when that one person that leaves that you weren’t ready for them to go.

I never understood how my mom never returned to me recovered from drugs, you know in them movies where the mom would be an addict but before the movie ends, she’s clean and ready to take on the role as mom. That wasn’t my story – and I carried that around for years and it impacted my relationships with those that I loved the most. I expected them to be perfect, without flaw because my greatest fear was losing them to the temptations of the world. I felt that I worked sooooo hard not to follow in her footsteps that everyone else around me should have the same will-power. Selfish me. It took midlife for me to figure out that my way of thinking was all wrong. For years God has been dealing with me on how to love perfectly – and I finally know what it means to let go of my expectations of others – and to love and accept them as is. It wasn’t easy because I cried a lot and had to face my fears, but it was worth it because my relationships have a new meaning. His love.

If you have an issue with letting go, ask God for help because with fear comes torment, rather you’re tormenting yourself or others, it’s not the way to live. He came so that we may have life and in abundance. It’s time to set the captive free.

Until next time Sweetie!

His love and peace!

Mecca Lasha ❤️❤️

John 10:10

The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it abundantly.

1 John 4:18

There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with torment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love.

1 Corinthians 13: 4-8

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no account of wrongs. Love takes no pleasure in evil, but rejoices in the truth. 7It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.

Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be restrained; where there is knowledge, it will be dismissed.

Self love

If He Can’t Handle No, It Might Be Your Fault 😧

We enter relationships wanting or needing a man to be a little dependent on what we feel are our best assets and qualities – and that can be in the kitchen, in the bedroom, monetarily or even mental support. You give him the best of you during the dating stage – and this is all good because he’s probably doing the same for you. Sweetie, you do realize that whatever you did to get him, you’ll have to do the same to keep him – and before you say it, YES, this goes both ways. There’s a verse in Beyoncé song Dance For You where she tells him “I wanna keep it how it is, so you can never say how it used to be.” Even she realizes how important consistency is because that’s the foundation of trust.

Let’s say that you started off as his cheerleader, helping him to get through some difficult situations and now he’s grown a trust that you’ll be there when times get rough mentally, so he depends on you in this area of his life. Two years down the road you can’t say “he calls me for everything, he needs to figure it out.” Why is it a problem now, when this is what you did to gain his trust?

You cooked all of your “top chef” dishes for him when you were dating, and now that you’re married, you can’t say “he wants me to cook all the dang time, he needs to cook!” Knowing he has never scrambled an egg! 🤣 You can’t put them cooking skills up when you went through his stomach to get to his heart sweetie. I’m just saying.

Them pole dancing classes were a priority to keep the bedroom spicy but now that it’s official, it’s back to pajamas and granny panties! 🤦🏾‍♀️

You bought him extravagant gifts in the beginning, and now you’re giving him a card and drawls! What in the world!? 😂😂

Sweetie pie, it’s not fair to stop doing all the things that he felt were apart of you – and your love for him. I know life happens, from kids to careers but there is still a person with real time emotions and needs that’s impacted by your bait and switch.

When you say no, reject or criticize the needs that you rooted in him – and he gets upset openly or quietly, it might be your fault 😬. You can’t spoil a man and not expect a tantrum to follow when he doesn’t get his way. It’s a lot of work 😫 maintaining a relationship but it needs to be cultivated in order to grow 🌱to the next level. Men do get comfortable, and QUICK but it’s your responsibility to remind him of the things that you miss. Pleaaaasse make sure when you bring up the subject that you’re not being hypocritical. 🤔

We as women have to be mindful of a man’s needs on all levels because they deal with so much in the world, fighting battles for themselves and us that we know nothing about. We are the backbone, it’s hard for him to walk without our support. 💪🏾

Until next time Sweetie. 😘

His peace and love

Mecca Lasha ❤️❤️

Proverbs 31;11-12

11Her husband has full confidence in her

and lacks nothing of value.

12She brings him good, not harm,

all the days of her life.

Dating, Marriage, Self esteem, Self love, self-care., Single Christian Women, Single women, vaginal care

Who Run The World? VAGINAS!!

Kitty, vajajay, whoo-ha, poom poom, coochie, beaver, taco, honey-pot, P word, or thang (my grams name for it). Whatever you may call it, she needs extra love, quality time & attention. You can’t just slap any product down there and hope it sticks. God created it to clean itself internally (stop douching) but what about the external care? It needs more than aerosol spray, soap & powder. It needs daily hydration for those who love tight pants & thongs (prevents friction) and my every other day shave queens 🙋🏾‍♀️. Yep, that’ll be me. Chile…waxing hurts and I can’t risk the possibility of losing sensation in important places with the laser treatments, I’m just saying.

Do you have a daily regimen to prevent and treat razor bumps, burns and hyperpigmentation (discoloration), which is also known as excessive melanin production? Ladies, it’s not safe practice to shave over those conditions without allowing time for your skin to heal and regenerate new skin cells because doing so can cause bacteria to grow and the area becomes inflamed or infected. You don’t want that.

That’s why I created Mink Kitty Coat a company that provides organic vaginal products for the external (mon pubis) area. We have an Organic Vaginal Balm for women like us who shave and genuinely care about what we subject our kitty to. It has natural ingredients to resolve inflammation, discoloration and bacteria. Oh and maintain that sweat causing odor. You never have to wonder about any adverse reaction, unless you’re not following the directions or are allergic to the listed ingredients, in which you can pronounce and identify without googles help.

– Mecca Lasha ❤️❤️

Humility, Self esteem, Self love, self-care.

Sit Down Be Humble (Jesus, Not Kendrick Lamar)

Here I am walking to my corporate lunch room with my Cup of Noodles, Cheez-Its’ and water, while the aroma of everyone’s food consumed the area, it smelled like some good ole meatloaf and mashed potatoes. I’m thinking “Girl, why didn’t you grab that leftover spaghetti.” Not because I would prefer that over my noodles, but because I start feeling a little embarrassed. Just as I was about to get up from the table, I heard “Sit down and be humble.” (No, it wasn’t Kendrick Lamar) I literally laughed out loud! Who am I to be embarrassed about having food!!!!

I sat my proud self down, added my water to the cup and enjoyed my lunch.

How many things have you not done in fear of what others would think? More than likely, that person that you’re so worried about impressing really doesn’t care anything about what you do. And if they did, you’re not the one with the issue, they are.

I’ve made so many decisions based on what I thought people would think of me, and if my false image would be exposed. I never wanted people to view me as being less fortunate or naive. I faked it a lot of my life because my background was poor and I didn’t have the ideal childhood. I lied about so much that I started believing myself and before I knew it, I was a total counterfeit. My self perception was horrible.

Ladies, I was soooooooo miserable. Wearing a mask is a lot of work. It wasn’t until I met My Lord, My Savior, My Friend and the great I Am in my life that I learned to appreciate the person that He created me to be and not what the world thought I should be. I was finally free! And my life became all about pleasing Him but as you can see, that ugly pride sneaks up every now and then, and I get a great reminder, “Sit down and be humble.”

– Mecca Lasha ❤️❤️